Charles say: Seems my wife sharing details with "just a few" friends now appears to be wildly out of control. >>>> Phil say:
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Charles say: For that...I am so very thankful. The ones she told about the implant didn't know about the ED issues at all. Thanks for the other viewpoint....definitely easier to think about to that way. I guess I can't be too upset. She's told her employer that she needs a week over the 1st of Dec....seem we're having a late Honeymoon. That's a surprise I can deal with.
>>>>>>>>>>>> carlos say: Charles, You mentioned in your previous post that you feel great in jeans and underwear now after your implant and the rubbing of your penis in your underwear feels good already. Just wondering does it not feel painful waering underwear already at this stage after surgery? Also what type of undies do you use? Boxer shorts or briefs or boxer briefs? How do you position your penis when flaccid inside your undies? Does it point up towards your belt or downwards or sideways on normal days?
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> charles say: > Charles, I won't say "good"...but "not bad" is a good way to describe it. The head of my penis was pretty sensitive the 1st few times wearing underwear. > Just wondering does it not feel painful waering underwear already The jeans are a bigger issue than the underwear. Until now I'd heard the expression "Dressing left or right"<meaning which side/pant leg did your penis and balls go>....and never was a big deal. Now it is a big deal....I have to fit to one side or the other.... no in between.
> Also what type of undies do you use? Boxer shorts or briefs or Fruit of the loom jockey briefs. I have some boxers but I've not worn them since the implant. A tight fit was initally suggested to keep things from moving around. The athletic supporter stayed on till day 5 or 6... How do you position your penis when flaccid inside your undies? The doctor has it semi-inflated and it's basically sticking out at a 90 degree angle and at times it's basically resting on my balls/pump<the more swollen I was...the more it rested there>. The out at a 90 degree angle was definitely uncomfortable in the underwear in the early going.....rub rub rub.....which made the bed and couch time all the better.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> ronald say: I feel for you this one. But you can always let them know that while they are "12 minute men" at best, you can go until your spouse begs you to stop. Minutes are nothing when you can please each other for hours and hours. That would make them think a bit and walk away with their tails between their legs. BTW, I am taking the first step in this journey today thanks to you. I also thank the gentlemen that told about this great site also. I've called my doctor for the surgery code and now I am rechecking with my insurance company about coverage. As it unfolds, I'll do my best to blog it out there too. Ron
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> cbrcouple say:
I am a member of this group because I have partial ED caused by nerve damage. I have it fully mastered with Cialis. Your story brought back memories. A few years ago my wife was working with a whole lot of girls and one Fijian giy. One day she came home and measured my erection. Later I found out it was part of their workplace discussion! It wasn't until then that I found out that I was 'bigger' than the average, according to her internet research. Our women probably don't discuss sex as much as men. But they certainly do discuss it, generally in a positive context. Your wife in terms of the gains that BOTH of you will make with your implant. Mark
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> charles say: > I feel for you this one. But you can always let them know that >while I fear the brave/bold ones<the ones already wanting to take a look> would take that as a challenge. I'm not willing to play that game of sexual chicken. > BTW, I am taking the first step in this journey today thanks to you. I'm glad you're moving forward. It makes me feel good that my sharing my own experience might help others.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Pete say:
Rest assured that it is helping all of us. Keep up the posts and thanks > I feel for you this one. But you can always let them know that >while I fear the brave/bold ones<the ones already wanting to take a look> would take that as a challenge. I'm not willing to play that game of sexual chicken. > BTW, I am taking the first step in this journey today thanks to you. I'm glad you're moving forward. It makes me feel good that my sharing my own experience might help others.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> riftalope say: If anyone starts acting silly around you and you know it's about your penis you can frown at them, calmly say "grow up", and go back to what you were doing. You might remind your wife that some of her "friends" might have trouble keeping their legs straight already. She might want to back off on you as a subject. She won't want anyone sniffing at the door. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Tom say: In our marriage- my wife, gabby by nature, has never been shy about sharing details with friends, coworkers and even family. When I started developing erection problems and difficulty reaching orgasms my wife shared the details and various treatments tried during with friends and coworkers. There is little more embarassing and humiliating to hear my wife discuss my erections or lack there of...with friends and family while I am in the same room. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> riftalope say:
Just remember that they are seeking help or trying to suss things out. People don't think farther than that sometimes. When this problem starts most guys haven't even talked about how private they'd want to be about it as a couple. Remind them that it's like having sex in front of your parents to you. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> charles say: I think I've been inclined to casually ask those same family and friends if they happened to know a good divorce attorney....see if that got my views across. Then again when my wife and I were dating....before she met any of my family...I sat her down for a little pep talk. I explained my family were nice folks and would always be nice to her. I also explained they were to be treated as if they were district atorney's trying to prosecute a murder trial. Best thing to do is keep your mouth shut and demand an attorney if you feel the least bit uncomfortable. Sort of a cross between "Meet the Parents" and "Law & Order". >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Cath say: From the female perspective, I suggest a workplace slide show and seminar on the implant. That'll keep em quiet ;) Hi all... I'm Cath... I work in men's health research. I've found out about your forum via the yahoo ED support group for partners. Is this forum a 'guys only' zone? Cheers, >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
ronald say: I just checked the original message of this group from 2000. The administrator made no restrictions. In fact, he was asking for all interested parties to contribute. You may be able to answer some of the questions that are brought up pertaining to our female spouses. There are aspects to the female mind that elude us, especially when dealing with the concerns on this site. Ron >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Cath say: Thanks Ron. I'll probably just stop by from time to time if that's ok with everyone. I don't want to intrude on what seems like a great place for guys to talk freely about ED! There are parts of the female mind that elude me too, but I'll do my best to solve any mysteries :) I'm actually a researcher (in Melbourne) on men's sexual health. At the moment I'm running a study looking at how oral medications for ED (Viagra, Cialis, Levitra) affect couples. I'll do a seperate post to see if anyone is interested in being involved... All the best, |